What movies have not aged well?

-”That should keep you in curry…” said to an Indian agent.

-”Ah so!”

-Comedy gay hitmen Mr Wint and Mr Kidd

Why do older siblings always hate younger siblings?

-”Why do Chinese girls taste different to all other girls?”

You Only Live Twice

-J W Pepper

Where are the gay people in India?

-All the bad guys are black.

Live and Let Die

-Bond tricks the virginal Miss Solitaire into having sex with him.

Why is the covert narcissist actively avoiding me when they see me everyday?

-Bond slaps Tania pretty hard, and gets rough with her when he tries to get her to confess what her orders were.

On Her Majesty’s Secret Service

-Bond’s idea of placating Goodnight after being forced to hide in the cupboard all night while he’s making out with Miss Anders is to tell her that her time will come soon…

My wife found I had been on Pornhub. She considers this adultery and wants a divorce. She hasn't touched me in over 6 years. What should I do?

-”She is very sexyful!”

-Bond getting slaphappy again, this time with Tiffany Case.

-Tracy’s father having uh…interesting ideas about what a happy marriage should be. Hell, he punches her out at one point.

Can a cop pull you over walking home asking why you are out so late?

A View to a Kill

From Russia With Love

-In the second half of Daylights, Bond gets aid from Afghan guerrillas. Rambo III is set against the same backdrop of the Soviets’ campaign in Afghanistan, getting help from the brave, starry-eyed, bold, freedom-loving peasant patriots against the cruel rapey Russians, and it even ends with a dedication to the mudjaheddin.

How do women feel when they are in love?

-Choo Me? Hai Fat?

Goldfinger

-What was with the over-acting of the French guy Mayday kills in the Eiffel Tower? Been watching too much Allo Allo?

Does anyone wear see-through clothes to show off underwear?

-Note how the next couple of ones were ….well…as grounded in reality as you can be with Bond.

Diamonds Are Forever

Octopussy

What was the first Native American tribe to inhabit Long Island, NY?

-Bond getting rough with Miss Anders, and slapping her. Christ!

-Bond forcing himself on Pussy.

-Bond disguised as a Japanese fisher looks exactly like - Sean Connery wearing a bad wig.

My boyfriend won’t tell me his past and it hurts me so I broke up with him what do I do?

-Bond slapping Tracy.

-Two words. Mickey Rooney.

Moonraker

What steps have you taken to stop being a targeted individual by gang stalkers? What has worked, what would you have done differently?

-”Quarrel. Fetch my shoes!”

-The comedy French taxi driver, also over-acting. Someone doesn’t like the French…

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

How should one handle a situation where they suspect their partner of cheating, but their partner denies it and claims it is all in their head?

Dr No

The Living Daylights & Rambo III

The Man with the Golden Gun

Have you ever been forced into bestiality?